Voice of Reason

Today's Prompt: I Take it Back. Write about a time that you lashed out at someone close to you because of frustration/fear/anger resulting from your health condition and you wish you could take it back. Forgive yourself and let it go.

This prompt resonates with me.

One of the symptoms of high blood sugar is rage. I won't call it uncontrollable, but it kind of is. The surge of stress hormones that occur with a high blood sugar is the same as that which occurs in the nervous system's Fight or Flight response. And my response is always Fight.

There were times early in my relationship with my husband where I would snap his head off while my blood sugar was high and he would snap back and I would escalate it and it would explode. We found out that, for us, it was important that he knew my blood sugar was high and that he touch me and tell me I was okay. The touch snapped me out of it and his gentle tone gave me no resistance. Nothing to fight back against. I always instantly stand down and realize what's happening.

When my blood sugar level returns to normal, we can talk about what I said or did.

If you love someone whose blood sugar fluctuates, one of the most supportive and gentle things you can do is honor that request - wait until their blood sugar has stabilized before you deal with the way you're upset that they behaved. Wait until it's level before you ask "what did you eat?" or "how dare you speak to me that way!" or "what is your problem?"

Their problem is that they are fighting for a shred of normal.

Now that I'm a parent, there is a new kink I haven't worked out yet. When I'm high, sometimes I snap at my daughter. My Sweetie. My everything.

And there's no begging patience from someone whom you are charged with protecting.